It has suddenly occurred to me that “God” is not the God I imagined as a child and have deeply embedded in my subconscious. God is not the controlling miracle worker. God can not make me go to sleep when I am not tired. God can not heal my lungs when they are sick. God can not create money for me when I am poor. God does not do magic tricks.
God is merely and profoundly my guide. God wills me to relax my thoughts so that I might go to sleep. God guides me to good doctors, and away from bad ones, so that I might be educated on a healthy way of life and given good medicine. God leads me to people who can give me a job so that I can make the money I need. God does not do magic tricks. God simply leads me and I have the choice of whether or not to listen.
It is up to me whether or not I let my mind calm down, take the doctor’s advice or accept the job that will provide some money. I am ultimately the one who makes the choice to sleep, be healthy or healthier, and to have money.
I was raised believing God could do anything and now I know he can not do anything without my cooperation. Cooperation comes in the form of integrity and openness. If I am without integrity, I will make the negative choice. If I am not open, I can not be guided by the spirits’ gentle whispers.
I must stop sleeping through life. I must start taking more time to allow the opportunity for spirit to speak to me. I must give my own spirit the respect it deserves for being responsible for ending up where I am. I must accept that responsibility for every shape, every nuance of my life. I must listen at every step. God is not a magician and if I fall out of the boat, he can not wave his wand and zap me back in.
Posts
3 comments:
I know I'm sounding like a broken record here, but with respect to organizing your book, I think your illness experience has dramatically changed your relationships with others. For example, this entry could go in a section about your relationship with God. Other entries could go in other appropriate sections. If you wanted to keep the diary motif, what would be interesting would be to arrange the entries temporally within each section, so the reader could see how your thoughts had changed with time.
I love this post, even though I still think that God CAN do some of the things you listed, but generally chooses not to. But I'm no longe rint he camp of people who sit aorund expecting a "miralce" or a "blessing" when most of the time God asks us to do the work for ourselves and be His hands for others. It is a coopertative relationship one that requires much effort on our part.
Also, I like what ob doctor suggested about doing sections in your book (expcwet then you will have those unavoidable entries that fit multiple topics)
This is a great blog, because of the truth you've realized. A lot of what you've said is what I've been saying to people and writing in my blogs for a while now. Hope you have time to check them out: http://junyabell.blogspot.com/
Take care, and stay well!
Post a Comment