A few months ago, we had a woman at our office quit unexpectedly. She had been there for ages and had deep roots with many of the other employees. In addition, she had been through a very physically traumatic event and struggled with pain and limitations. When she left it was dramatic and traumatic for all that knew her. At home she had many, many animals to care for which required buckets of time and money. I wondered to myself how she would manage without this job and this group of individuals to support her.
Today I heard that she has a new job. Not only is she managing, she seems to be flourishing. She loves her new employer and believes she will work there until the day she retires. She has given away all of the old work clothes and has happily renounced her old definition of self as a technician. She has let go of old habits and safety zones and is flying.
This kind of story makes me reflect on my own life. What am I holding onto that would better be let go of? It's so easy to get caught in the "But this (place, person, job) provides me x,y, and z so I can't leave". What if I could still have x, y and z along with q, r and s? Shouldn't I raise my bar and go for everything I want?
Then I get caught in the next thought loop of thinking "But am I just experiencing the grass-is-always-greener syndrome?" Certainly, I have had times when I thought I was letting go to move on to bigger and better only to find that what I had was pretty darn great and my expectations were just totally out of whack. Whoops!
I'd like to end this post with a nice conclusion but I have none. All I have decided to do is work for the life I want while running parallel with the life I'd prefer to dump and hope the former wins the race. Am I being wimpy or sensible?